11 ways to Improve Assertiveness

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What is assertiveness?   

Whether you like a raise, a promotion, just to see a positive change in your life or anything you want to accomplish, you need to build an essential skill called assertiveness. Being assertive means having the power to confidently communicate what you like and express your thoughts flamboyantly, no matter whatsoever.  

Assertiveness is an interpersonal skill—a behaviour used to effectively communicate and have an interaction with somebody without any hesitation. Being assertive is holding the spirit of righteousness and taking the right decision in most situations. To be precise, assertiveness is nothing but a thin line between an aggressive style and a sublime style.   

Key benefits of assertiveness   

The ability to express your thoughts and actions confidently is a crucial life skill for your personal and business life. The advantages of being assertive include:   

Building self-confidence

The best confidence builder is developing the power to face your fear. The more you develop comfortability around your circle, the more you feel worthy about your behaviour.    

Assertiveness—a fundamental leadership trait

In business, leaders have to be upfront, direct and ready to delegate tasks effectively to manage people and run a corporation. In your business life, the power of being assertive is fundamental for a leadership role as well as for running a successful organisation.  

Assertive people are less stressed. Unresolved issues that you’re afraid of will linger and create stress in your mind. This prolonged resistance to facing your fears baffles your psychological state and well-being.  

The power to handle stress in crucial times is an excellent testament to assertiveness as it builds conviction and confidence.  

Assertiveness—an impacting communication style 

The power to communicate what you like or don’t like lets people know where you stand on a specific issue. It’s a technique that builds open and honest relationships.   

Being assertive helps you taste the essence of victory in achieving your destination. Being quiet and feeling shy leads to pessimistic behaviour. Assertive communication is fundamental to accomplishing your destined personal goals.    

Techniques to build assertiveness  

Some ways to build assertiveness are as follows:   

  • Practice 

Practice is a key to any accomplishment. An individual becomes an expert in a domain only through practice and self-confidence. Most people tend to underestimate the habit of practice and bluntly believe that learning is superior to practice. This is absolutely a hoax. If you want to be an assertive person, you ought to focus on practising rather than merely learning skills.

  • Use ‘I’ statements  

‘I’ statement is an assertive statement; it displays an attitude of confidence and solemnity in the behaviour as well as in character.   

  • Focus on specific behaviour instead of making it personal 

If you’re unhappy, you have to deal without getting too personal. To be assertive, one must concentrate intensely on building themselves and ignore other people’s possessions and laurels.  

  • Say ‘No’ but in a polite way

If you don’t like anything that is insisted upon you, saying ‘no’ to that is not a bad thing. On the contrary, it is very pivotal to showcase your feelings.

But it doesn’t need to be arrogant. You can convey what you feel and be polite and subtle at the same time.

  • Have one consistent message 

If you’re handling someone manipulative who’s preying on your guilt or being an imbecile, repeat your message clearly that you are stronger and never fall prey to their manipulation.   

  • Don’t be apologetic 

It is common to make mistakes, but it doesn’t mean you have to say sorry for everything. You need to understand the fundamental fact that making mistakes is the only way of gaining knowledge and experience in your life.  

It’s okay to make mistakes, but you have to make sure that you also learn.   

  • Look confident

Good posture and eye contact assist you to appear more assertive. Make your facial expressions neutral or positive. Don’t expose yourself to the fullest.   

  • Speak calmly  

Assertiveness isn’t equivalent to haughtiness. You can simultaneously be bold and crisp in explaining your thoughts. When you are afraid to speak, inhale slowly and keep your voice away from stuttering. If you’re feeling emotional, wait for a minute, relax and continue your conversation.   

  • Empathy  

Consider the emotions and opinions of others. Empathy is a fundamental trait to be successful for every business. Friendly people and prolific leaders exhibit a good sense of empathy for their folks and colleagues.  

  • Explore other solutions or compromises

Compromise is necessary even when you’re assertive. Be willing to figure out what mistake you have on your side and develop the habit of introspection. This trait helps you understand yourself better and brings clarity to your life.   

  • Be brave 

You can’t always be afraid to face your opposition; you need to speak up for yourself; therefore, you need to approach each situation courageously.   

Summing up   

Being assertive and being nice aren’t at odds. Assertiveness enables friendly people to showcase their talent and prevents them from becoming angry or resentful afterwards.  

Learn to say ‘no’ with a smile. Tell what you like about others and don’t lie to yourself. Remember the quote that ‘You are the creator and destroyer of your life’.


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